You Can Call Me Saucy

Chapter 2 – The Story of Us

So, where were we? Oh yes, FF & I had talked on Thanksgiving – pretty much a let it all hang out, take me or leave me talk. Pretty intense for people that only had met a few days before. He’d asked me to join him for an African Dance Class…and I said yes. If you need more details, you can read chapter  one of Our Story here.

Going Out OnA Limb:

I was really excited that you had asked me to hang out. Ahead of time, with no ulterior motives and after knowing how crazy as all get out I was. I thought maybe it was time to put my guard down a bit. So, a few days after Thanksgiving I invited you to a local karaoke bar to hear me sing. I think maybe you know now but you didn’t then, that me inviting you to hear me sing is one of the most personal things I can do. I like to come across as confident but when I sing I feel very vulnerable. That I trusted you enough to let you see that says volumes – even if you didn’t know it at the time. I had a standing date with one of my male friends, LS, and we would pick up Chinese food and meet for karaoke on Sunday nights. It was completely platonic – he was that guy friend who would be your gay best friend, if he was gay, but he’s not, kind of guy. Anyway, I invited you to join. I guess weird to have a chaperone but I wasn’t making sense with any decision I was making at this time. It just seemed right . We had been texting all night & I knew you were going to come over after you finished your laundry (side note: laundry has been an integral part of our relationship). I was so nervous & I wondered if you would actually show. When you opened the door, I swear, my stomach backflipped. You came over and sat down. I introduced you to LS & offered to grab you a drink. You said you were all set. You looked really uncomfortable.


Sunday I received a text invite to join you for karaoke. So I made my way to the bar. I could tell you were excited and nervous and I really liked how you smiled a lot. You introduced me to LS and we all chatted a bit. You told me you could sing and then you definitely backed it up. I remember you singing a Sarah McLachlan song, that’s when I knew you could sing. I was impressed. Shortly after that it was late so we left. We all said our goodbyes & I followed you out of the parking lot. I ended up behind you for the most of the way to my house. I decided to send you a text and let you know that I was impressed that you drove a Jeep. A woman that drives a Jeep is hot. You responded wondering if it made it more impressive that you could also change you own oil and change a flat. I don’t remember what I wrote back but I know I implied that you earned some points in my book.

Tuesday we met at the YMCA for the African Dance Class. I introduced to a coworker of mine who was also attending the class that night. When we got into the room, the teacher (who was another coworker) informed that we wouldn’t just be observing as we thought was the plan, we would be participating. I don’t even know how to describe this class. It was intense. We had already proven to each other that we could dance well together but now we were trying to really prove ourselves. We made it all the way through the class but it was most definitely tough.  We made it out to the parking lot and it was pretty obvious that you needed to eat and you lived a ways away. I decided to invite you over to my place because it was closer and I said I would cook for you since I owed you a meal. I cooked you steak and veggies – no carbs. We chatted and hung out. We watched tv for a bit. After both my roommates got home, you decided it was time to go. I walked you out to say goodnight. And I kissed you.

My Side:

You kissed me! I was blissful! This seemed so normal. I’d never had a normal dating/courtship thing (and as it turns out, I still haven’t – read on.) You cooked me dinner! You cooked me dinner with no carbs! You gave me water – out of a bottle but poured over ice into a glass! You did the dishes right.after.we.finished.eating!!! We discussed our families a lot more that night. Where we came from, how we grew up. I was so impressed by your cockiness mixed with this kind, mannerful nice guy. I didn’t know where things were supposed to go from here. It had been a mere week since the “let’s just be friends”  talk and already I wanted to go back on both the things I said I wasn’t going to be. I fell fast & hard. You would get weird about things. We texted all day every day – sometimes more than one hundred from each of us.  We started inviting each other to things. You invited me to a Christmas party (what a story!). I invited you to a Christmas party (and told me I was the hottest girl there. Again – another great story!). We would hang out just to watch tv. Your birthday was in January and I baked you a cake. It was awful but you ate it anyway. We planned a night that I would spend the night – the entire night. We even got movies for the next morning. We had a great weekend for your birthday. When Valetine’s Day came around a month later you made it clear we were NOT celebrating. I was kinda crushed but I agreed. We ended up going bowling in the afternoon & watching the NBA Slam Dunk competition. After that night, things got weird. We were spending just as much time together but you were different. You were standoffish. I asked if anything was on your mind and you repeatedly told me no. I wasn’t stupid, it was clear something was going on. After about two weeks of this I couldn’t handle it and we sat down and discussed it like two adults. No crying, whining or name calling. Just an intense conversation where we both just heard each other out. I was ready to put a label on this. We’d been hanging out for four months. I was a frequent overnight guest. We’d had the “not seeing other people” conversation. I was at my wit’s end.


After my birthday, things got very physical very quickly. I felt like we weren’t spending as much time just doing things together that were fun – outside the bedroom. We fell into a pattern of hanging out on weekends and having a good time but I didn’t feel the same as I did when we first started hanging out. I needed to know that what we had was more than a physical connection. So I started pulling away a bit to see what we had other than that. 


We continued to hang out, talk and eventually found that common ground again. We started having those long late night talks again. We still went out and did things – even had sleepovers. We just made sure it was JUST a sleepover. Eventually all the pieces just feel into place and we found that perfect combination of maintaining a healthy mental & emotional relationship with a physical relationship. This common ground is nirvana! It hasn’t stopped again since then 🙂

We were at this point where we just couldn’t get enough of each other. I kept an overnight bag at your place and I slept there probably 3-5 nights a week. We enjoyed talking, watching tv, starting to enjoy the nice weather. You invited me to meet your family (you had met mine a few months prior – but they only lived a town away…not a state). We had a wonderful day in NH. Your family was great and so welcoming. But,you still didn’t introduce me as girlfriend. I mean, I think it was evident but you were so reluctant. It didn’t make any sense to me but we’d talked about it a bazillion times. I just went a long with it because as long as nothing changed, I wasn’t going to rock the boat. Then one night, you told me you loved me. I think I made you say it a thousand times. I was on top of the world…but I still couldn’t say it on Facebook…


We got to Breakwater’s for opening day. We’d planned well ahead of time that we were going to make this day EPIC. It was going to be you, me, Mamacita, BRE &  bunch of other people we loved all hanging out at a bar on the lake. You came right to my house when you got out of work and you got all changed while I cooked us dinner (pub burgers & onion rings – very good). We had a couple beers and walked down to enjoy the night. We had a great time and far too many drinks. You, Mamacita and I decided we were done spending money on drinks so we headed back to my place to play “Porch Monkey” (no offense intended. We would just sit on lawn chairs on the lawn of my apartment building & drank beer while talking and people watching). I fell asleep on you guys and you woke me up and told me you were heading out. I remember knowing it wasn’t a good idea to let either of you drive. I was very focused on stopping you. That was the first time I said I love you.

Not long after that it was just you and I some random night of Porch Monkey talking about this that and everything. I eventually directed the conversation towards the change of living situations coming up. The lease was up at my current place and BRE owned a condo. Him & I had talked about moving in there in June but he planned on being gone by October. So I mentioned to you that I would be needing a roommate in the not so distant future.  You then asked me what that meant and wondered if you’d have your own room. So I let you know that no, it would in fact be us moving in TOGETHER. So we went ahead and talked about what we’d need to buy (or find) in order to move in together. Maybe three days later we told BRE our idea and he confirmed what we’d both been subconsciously thinking…we would all just move into condo on June 1st. All three of us.


So on June 1st, 2009, the DZ was born. We moved in together. He finally gave into the pressure and we changed our Facebook status to In A Relationship (because it wasn’t terribly obvious right?!). But the story’s  not over yet. Tomorrow we’ll talk about some of our favorite memories and inside jokes and reflect back on one year of living together. This is too much fun to stop now XO


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  1. * Genina says:

    OMG, how cute are you two? Seriously!!! I love that you sang for him and that you guys did some intense african dancing together too, what an adorable story!!! So happy you moved in together!

    | Reply Posted 8 years, 8 months ago

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